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Sunday, July 19, 2015

Transformation

After a long time, I watched a Malayalam movie last Sunday on TV. 

The story – a social drama – showcased the pristine beauty of Kerala, the uncertainties of life, the consequences of childhood waywardness, and the comfort of marijuana. But even while engrossed in the movie, random thoughts of my childhood flitted in and out of my mind like fireflies on a wet, dark, moonless night. And as the movie came to an end, I sat trapped in nostalgia. Then slowly, very slowly I saw my present form beside the reflections of my past. It was that of a stranger, disconnected from everyone and everything I once loved and cherished.

I had turned into a recluse, fashioned by circumstances in the sands of time without my consent or knowledge. To me everyone had become a potential foe or a threat. And I had either distanced myself or lashed out at anyone who tried to come close to me. As I sat stupefied under the weight of the revelation, I wondered: “Would I be able to enjoy life once again selflessly in all its innocence, trust, and sense of wonder?”

Just like the old times!